i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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