I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
