Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
We had to coat check the pizza.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
