I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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