Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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