so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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