ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm too high and old for this...
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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