she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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