what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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