So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
