no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
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