My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
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If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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