Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Couch. On fire.
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