Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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