Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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