I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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