Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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