im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I can't put those talents on a resume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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