You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
