ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
