Your dad touched me again.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize