I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
