It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
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Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
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It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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