I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
