is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize