just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
