so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
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He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
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I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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