Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
My life is pants optional.
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