just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
