You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
