I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
