please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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