I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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