I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
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Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
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And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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