The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I forget how to act sober
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
