im gay
i know
yea but for you.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize