So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
