Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize