I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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