We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize