I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
