Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
