what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
