dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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