Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize