Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
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Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
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Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing