hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
babies were throwing up all over the place
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.