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• (858): View more from California

  I like my sex mixed with concussions.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.

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  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (616): View more from Michigan

  I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches

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