Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
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