My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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