i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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