am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
