Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
